Funny Pet Storys

 A young boy, about eight years old, was at the corner ‘Mom & Pop’ grocery picking out a pretty good size box of laundry detergent. The grocer walked over, and, trying to be friendly, asked the boy if he had a lot of laundry to do. ‘Oh, no laundry,’ the boy said, ‘I’m going to wash my dog.’ ‘But you shouldn’t use this to wash your dog. It’s very powerful and if you wash your dog in this, he’ll get sick. In fact, it might even kill him.’ But the boy was not to be stopped and carried the detergent to the counter and paid for it, even as the grocer still tried to talk him out of washing his dog.
  About a week later the boy was back in the store to buy some candy. The grocer asked the boy how his dog was doing. ‘Oh, he died,’ the boy said. The grocer, trying not to be an I-told-you-so, said he was sorry the dog died but added, ‘I tried to tell you not to use that detergent on your dog.’ ‘Well,’ the boy replied, ‘I don’t think it was the detergent that killed him.’ ‘Oh? What was it then?’
   ’I think it was the spin cycle!’ the boy replied again.

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It might be hard to believe if you saw him sleeping peacefully on Pat’s lap, but Nicky has always been easily persuaded to turn into a tough guy.  Right after we adopted him, we temporarily converted the spare bedroom into his nursery, and when someone entered the room the tiny black kitten would stare fiercely from a corner and hiss, as though to warn you he would tear you apart if you got any closer.

   He’s gone beyond hissing as he’s grown up.  One afternoon, he was lying on the floor in front of the refrigerator when its motor came on.  Startled, Nicky leaped up, back arched and teeth bared, and faced the refrigerator.

   As an honorable cat, Nicky waited a moment to give it a chance to apologize for disturbing him.  When it didn’t, he looked it over, sized it up, and perhaps decided that even if it was bigger, it wasn’t tougher than he is.

   Then Nicky reached out with a paw and gave the offending machine two quick cuffs.  It didn’t fight back, and Nicky turned and walked away, apparently satisfied that he had taught it a lesson about starting something with a lion-hearted little cat

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Mobile windshield replacement and repair is a big business here. Due to the construction and gravel trucks with uncovered loads, we are constantly having auto glass replaced. We can’t get a pizza delivered, but can have someone come to our home on a Saturday to replace a windshield.

Its so routine to us that when Dennis arrived we just pointed him at the damaged windshield and forgot about him. Until we heard a cat snarl, a man scream and glass breaking. Both of us ran for the door, hub saying “badword, Rush is out” and me “badword, Bear’s out”. (Someday, we will settle on a real name for him). We found poor Dennis on the ground, covering his face with his arms and gasping for breath, with the wind knocked out of him.

As we were frantically asking “What happened? are you OK? should we call an ambulance” Dennis managed to get out “I was attacked *gasp, gasp* by a *gasp* orange bobcat *gasp, gasp* with a big tail”

Once we managed to get him semi upright and pry his arms away from his face (Ya want to talk about scared? I was sure major lawsuits were in our future), he calmed down some. He recovered really fast when hub handed him a new 20 dollar bill (hope he didn’t get ink on his hands…)

Dennis was OK, his elbow was skinned and he had a bump on his head, but mostly was worried about what his company would say about him smashing our broken windshield. (something to do with quality of service – they just toss them in a bin at the shop)

It seems that not only did we forget to warn him that we had a porch thug, we also forgot to tell him to keep his van doors closed. Mr 20 is fearless about vehicles and WILL investigate any in his yard.

Poor Dennis was carrying the cracked windshield to put in his van, but when he got to the door he startled Mr 20, who responded with his feral scream and jumped out of the van. Dennis thought Mr 20 was leaping at his face, so dropped the glass, covered his face with his arms and tripped while backing up, knocking the air out of his lungs.

I’d guess we are out of that glass company’s service area now.

- HOSTDes

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They can be helpful

They protect our children

They look out for the smaller ones

They are great at decorating for the Holidays

They have “great” expectations

They show us how to relax

They “converse” with each other

They help you when you’re down

They are Patriotic

They are happy to “test” the water

They love their “teddies”

They know who’s “BOSS”

AND – They know when we need a good LAUGH!

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